Get The Pliers

I'll never feel so alive.....

Medicated and in a fair bit of pain. I mean, don't get me wrong, it's a lot of fun. Though I've heard it said that too much of a good thing can ruin it. Unless it's scotch we're talking about. In that case, I highly recommend increasing the dose.

Why do I find myself in this condition?

Well, my wisdom teeth have decided to do what wisdom teeth do. That is to say, cause misery. Fortunately (or unfortunately, it depends) they come out on Saturday. All of 'em. I'll be awake for the procedure. When I mention that last part, folk get this pained expression and usually utter something to the effect of "that's sucks" or "you're crazy".

I am crazy! That's nothing new.

This procedure needs doing. I'm gonna do it and deal with the aftermath while slurping my liquefied food out of a cup.

Speaking of food, the lead up to this was a little humorous.

Over the last few years, the aforementioned teeth have caused minor grief here and there that usually subsided within a few days. No big deal. This time, it felt different. However, me being the obstinate fool that I am resulted in a visit to the dentist being put off.

Yes, I know, I know, shut up and let me finish.

So there I was, sitting down to a fine bowl of caribou stew. As I endeavored to enjoy the meal, I was met with a smidgen of agony every time I chewed. Cue the defeated look.....

"That's it.......don't FUCK with my ability to enjoy food!"

Needless to say, I had an appointment within 25 minutes of this experience.

I've gotta be honest, the idea of looking like a chipmunk for a few days has some interesting merits. Think of how many small children I can freak out!

I'm simply hoping that a good single malt works well as a supplemental pain killer. Either that or I'd like to have someone on stand by with a mallet to knock my ass out every time I show even the slightest inkling towards waking up.

You want a job?

....as I do when your world falls apart!